Real people. Real journeys. Relatable stories.
2015
Trying to clear my mind
Traditional deep-breathing meditation
Level: Beginner/ Intermediate
Meditation was recommended to me many times, so I tried the traditional method of deep breathing while sitting still. This did not work for me, as my mind constantly wandered. Another type of meditation might've been better, or easier for me to start with.
2016
Re-framing my idea of success
The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck
Effectiveness: High
The Courage to be Disliked
These books made me realize my anxiety stemmed from comparing myself to others, needing to be liked, and feeling the need to achieve an idea of success imposed by society. These books helped me align myself to activities that brought internal validation, and drove a mindset shift that reduced my anxiety and the weight I put on what's outside my control.
I worked with a therapist to re-prioritize where I spent my time, to trust in my decisions, and to have confidence things would work out vs. catastrophizing. But my therapist was not a good fit and I did not see improvement. Can't say that it was necessarily the type of therapy that didn't work for me, or just the therapist wasn't a fit.
A lot of my anxiety resulted from procrastination around work. This book led me to create systemic changes that helped me be more productive, and be less anxious about not getting work done. Some of these changes were:
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Keeping notes & a checklist
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Keeping a calendar & blocking off time for certain tasks
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Getting into a work flow by tackling 2-3 small problems or emails first
My anxiety led me to constant ruminating on the past, or worrying about the future. Practicing the concepts of mindfulness introduced in these two books significantly relieved my anxiety.
These books helped reframe my mindset around what really mattered to me in my life, which helped reduce my anxiety around smaller things. I also was able to trust more in the fact that things ultimately would work out in the end, and that each failure was actually a learning opportunity to improve.
My anxiety would come out whenever I made mistakes or when I felt like I did not do a good enough job at work, sports, etc. I learned to be kinder and more compassionate to myself, which in turn reduced my inner-critic and helped reduce my anxiety (especially around work & social situations).
2022
Learning to Manage my Anxiety
4,7,8 Breathing (video)
Level: Beginner
Effectiveness: High
I worked with a therapist and learned a variety of techniques and life changes that were effective in helping me with the anxiety I experienced and how to manage it when it popped up.
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Meditation - I learned that by walking and deep breathing even just 5 minutes every morning, I felt significantly calmer
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4,7,8 Breathing (performed while walking)
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Morning journaling (2 pages every morning after I walked)
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Exercise - 1 hour a day especially when experiencing anxiety
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Scheduling 30 minute breaks during my day
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Reducing alcohol & nicotine
Working with a therapist through pieces of my child hood (such as having no parents around and only getting acknowledgment from my parents when I succeeded) allowed me to heal the past, which in turn reduced a lot of my anxiety and stress and around work. This work was difficult, long, and painful but has been one of the most effective things I have done to date.
Probably the most effective work I have done to date, IFS has allowed me to balance the different protective mechanisms that emerge when I am triggered (which cause anxiety). I've felt way more balanced since doing this work, and my anxiety on a day to day basis is almost gone.